The Frank Smith's Getting Married Blues

He woke up this morning
And listened to Creed
He's gonna get married
So he can breed
He's gonna go to The Doll House
And raise hell with Jerry Gwaldabi and his friends
He's gonna smoke some cigars
Because his life as he knows it soon will end

Refrain
He's gonna be the groom
The only one in the room
He's going to Cancun
His Monte Carlo goes vroom

He's down on his knees and he prays
That he isn't going to his doom

He woke up this morning
Down in Fuquay Varina
It ain't like Sioux City
Where the food's like Purina
He's gonna marry Ellen
Who's a manager at Centura Bank
We asked him where he met her
And he said while parasailing on Jordan Lake

Refrain

Well Frank's getting hitched
And we were wondering why he would ever do a thing like that
So you better take a big drink
Maybe take another Ð that is your task
We asked him why he's marrying Ellen and he said "if you've seen this chick you don't have to ask"

He's gonna be the groom
The only one in the room
Honeymoon in Cancun
His Monte Carlo goes vroom

His Monte Carlo is maroon
You better show us your knife collection now
Before Ellen makes you bury it in a tomb